chainsaws & jelly is based in newark, nj.

e-mail: chainsawsandjelly@gmail.com


Like what you see? Like us on Facebook!

FOLLOW US ON INSTAGRAM, too!




Friday, May 29, 2009

High Life by Hayes Hemingway



I was looking at an advertisement for a doctor's office that provided medical Marijuana evaluations and it listed nearly a dozen sicknesses treatable by Mary Jane. I only related to one listed ailment--Migraine headaches, and I didn't even get those often. The rest listed were HIV/AIDS, Arthritis, Anorexia, Cancer, Chronic Pain, Epilepsy, Glaucoma, Lupus, Multiple Sclerosis, and Spasticity. Mind you all throughout California offices and dispensaries list a few out of the many illnesses and diseases Pot can help treat. There are too many to list all at once. But in my case I use it to treat my anxiety, and I was thinking to myself, "What do I use Marijuana for?" like "Each time I use Marijuana, how does it improve my quality of life?" Every time I light up it's not cause I'm nervous or worried, so what are some reasons I do?

The oldest assumption with Marijuana is that people use it recreationally -- and "recreationally" is a term that has evolved. It used to mean the same thing "hobby" does but now it pretty much means "whenever I feel like it." While there are people who use it all day, everyday--that's not me and even if I was in a position where my money produced its own income, I still wouldn't chief all day. I have a mentality that makes me set and accomplish numerous goals everyday, so being high all day long wouldn't help me.

In one of his comedy routines Katt Williams acts out an exchange between his dealer and himself, which illustrates my point here perfectly.

"I got this shit right here it's called Deaf."
"Death?"
"No Deaf, like you can't hear."
"Deaf? Oh, no. I can't smoke that. I got shit to do today."

There is an accurate misconception with weed that it makes you lazy. Not all weed makes you lazy, but there are definitely some repeat offenders like Haze, Kush and "Black" weed. When I was living in Miami in 2004, my cousin had his friend come over with "Black" weed. It's quite popular in northern Florida--like around Tallahassee. It is known to make you lazy. That day, before my cousin's friend came over, we spent all morning discussing errands and how important it was that we get them done. Don't ask me what was on that to-do list, that was 5 years ago, but I'll tell you I wish I had known the potency and effects before smoking the "Black" weed because we never left the apartment. I assumed I could smoke it and function. Knowing how imperative it was to get our tasks completed we didn't even roll a big blunt. It was pretty small. The bud was very dark in color and very sticky. It was instant-comatose, which fucked me up emotionally because I wasn't pleased that the day got wasted, so this was the kind of high better enjoyed after a long productive day.

I love long productive days.

Ok back to the assumptions about why people use Marijuana and how it fits with how I use it.

Is Marijuana a party drug? If it is, I don't fit that mold because I don't party. The few times I do go out, I have to be stoned, so I'm not being a party-pooper to everyone else. Case and point--this past Sunday I was going to a party I had been looking forward to. I was in the line, which was long and below me to wait in. This was a line that wasn't moving fast enough. That's the perfect situation for me to get irritated in. Since I wasn't stoned I led the campaign to go home and be stoned on the couch rather than be at this party I had been anticipating for over a week. I actually only have a good time when I'm at a party where I can medicate. Then I'm everybody's best friend. The only party I went to regularly for years was in New York City, and it was only on Monday nights, and you could smoke all you wanted in there. I'm sure these places in California exist, but I have yet to go to one, nor am I dying to, but I'd like that NYC party to come to LA, badly.

I have more fun when I'm medicated.

It's like my friend who told me she was stocking up at the dispensary because she planned to spend the day with her mother. I completely related to her need to be tranquilized to the situation. If she didn't medicate her day would suck and it would contribute negatively to her relationship with her mother, whereas medicated, the day would be a really good time for all parties.

Marijuana makes the unpleasant, pleasant and I'm definitely that point illustrated. In order for me to be personable, polite and somebody you want to see again, I need to medicate. If it's not related to children or charity, I generally don't have a nice comment about the situation. That's especially true with partying. I can't tell you why I don't give a shit about partying, drinking and loud music. It could be that I developed an allergy to it while living in North Jersey, the epicenter of raucous, steroid-fueled, Techno Guido culture, or I was raised to be an introvert. I honestly don't know.

I do know that Marijuana helps me build bridges quicker. I'll be over something much more quickly when I can medicate. It definitely speeds up the process in a really good way. Life is about living and functioning and sometimes it's not that easy. Marijuana is like a life-coach who's on your side, guiding you along and giving you the boost needed to keep on ticking.

According to the Press of Atlantic City, Miss New Jersey 2006 Georgine DiMaria, feels that "Marijuana could be a miracle drug for a lot of people." Dimaria, 24, said that as a child her asthma was so severe it left her bedridden, forcing her to be home-schooled. She became Miss New Jersey in 2006 and competed in the Miss America pageant that same year. Since then she has served as National Spokeswoman for the American Lung Association. Miss DiMaria emphasizes that she does not condone smoking. "When you can't breathe, nothing else matters," she said. She learned that her uncle in South Carolina was using it to treat Cancer, and when she investigated it for herself, she was impressed. "It helped immensely." DiMaria kept her usage quiet during her reign as Miss New Jersey because of the controversy surrounding the drug and its potential to be abused.

It's this abuse that I'm calling out today, just kidding. The great thing about Marijuana is that no matter how much you take the worst thing that will happen to you from it is that you'll fall asleep. So while it is encouraged that you medicate to your needs, you are also nudged into fully enjoying it. For example I was in a dispensary on April 20th 2009 and when I walked in it was 4:20 PM, so they offered me several edibles and passed around a joint that was as long as my arm. I got a gift pack because it was a holiday and that gift pack contained more edibles, a nice jar of kief and something else I can't remember. The point is that Marijuana can help you deal with a number of things going on in your life, and over time you'll discover plenty more. So I guess you don't need one particular reason, you just need to recognize that your life will be improved when you treat your ailments. An improved quality of life is what I use Marijuana for.


3 comments:

White Lion said...

I totally love your High Life Story. It is great to know about another persons internal views and I thought you did a great job promoting the positive uses of our favorite medication. Speak loud and strong. Your personal story was very much like mine and my wifes. Thank you for your voice and opinion. I hope to have a smoke with you one day.

Anonymous said...

Great story.. I have to say though, I think we'd have alot less nutty people causing havioc and alot more level headed people on this planet if weed was as socially acceptable as alchohol is today. Being a habitual smoker myself, I too believe that it improves my quaility of life for much deeper reasons than just the head buzz you carry for a few hours. I hope that more people could understand and identifiy with your reasoning here because it's definately on point. pC

Andrew said...

"I love to smoke marijuana-
It gives me a deep meditation"